Visitor

How is it to be different, to always feel like an alien, whether you are with your friends, or at school/work. You not only see the world differently, but understand it as well. Always feel like your never going to be a part of any friendship. Being too different that you actually need to play a role of normal person. Some days not knowing whether you are totally crazy, or is it just people around you. 

Sometimes I wonder how is it to be as everyone else. Sometimes I wonder how is it to be human, and how much different am I. Its like visiting different country, but instead of become a resident, you stay as a visitor. You walking around the city, looking at other people and trying to find something familiar. 

Living in between the lines.

For so many years I hope that when I will get older, I will definitely have people who I will call my friends. People who will really know who I am. Sadly, I am 21 now, and there is only few who know my last name. I always knew much more about others, than they did about me. I would carefully listen every time any one would speak to me. I would remember all they said, and how they said it. I would then analyse and re analyse. Like some kind of alien machine, which were sent to collect data. Any time I go out I look at everyone, I analyse what type of clothes they wearing, what they are doing, how they are walking… all that I would then carefully analyse and know who those people are. Maybe some of you would call it creepy, or at least strange. But it is who I am. I think people today don`t make friends, and people who they do call friends, are really just people they know, and meet more frequently than they meet others.